Daniel Chae

the finish line

Daniel ChaeComment

To end the year, I ran two miles to finally hit 400 miles for the year that was 2013. At roughly 8 minutes a mile, that's 3,200 minutes on the road or 53.3333333333333333333 hours of toll on my body, knees, pushing myself in discomfort. When I run, it's a chance to get away from my worries, anxieties, insecurities, and simply think about nothing. It feels like I'm purging myself. It's therapeutic and calms my mind. I like running because it takes grit and a stubbornness to continue on through uncomfortable circumstances. 

So what? *golf clap* I haven't really achieved anything. The ending to this dramatic emotional buildup and me crossing the finish line to this goal seems a bit anticlimactic. The truth is, I'm tired. The clip below best sums up how I feel right now.

If I could have dinner with anyone, both non-fictional or fictional, it would have to be Forrest Gump. Rich, diverse life experiences, while childlike but profound in his naivety. So much to glean from. I just picture myself with the widest smile the entire conversation.

I'm scared of growing up. I'm scared of the person I see in the mirror, the person that is jaded, cynical, ridden with anxiety. I want to be a better man. Wiser, smarter. But it's so hard to do without sacrificing your childlike innocence. It's a difficult balance to strike, but I want to find it this year. 

Below is a video called "The Scared is scared". It's a little story told by a six-year-old, but in its simplicity and innocence, it screams at you so loudly.

Be childlike, "don't stop imagining", make mistakes but be genuine and sincere. Be kind and love others; don't forget to love yourself (give yourself some damn credit). Most importantly, smile.

2014 is gonna be great.